Movies
George G Smith Jr’s Future is…
The movie Amelie is one of my favorite movies. In the beginning of the movie, the narrator goes on to explain the characters with a series of quirks – the little things that make each character different. Here’s a clip:
One of my many quirks is the fact that I google the ending to everything – movies, books, television shows – I can not stand to wait to figure out what will happen next. That, along with my favorite french saying “Je sais l’avenir par coeur” (via Paul Valery) illustrates what I want out of life: I want to know how it ends in intimate detail. I want to know the future by heart.
Since you can not “know” the future, I tried to impose my Will on it. I have a very strong Will. I feel that I can accomplish anything and, ultimately, when I set my mind to things – they happen. With that Will, I tried to create a scenario where I knew the future – in particular my love life. The Will is strong and I almost made it happen. When it didn’t, I found myself befuddled. How could I not get what I wanted? How could I not make something I felt such powerful passion for reality?
I was talking to Sarah today and, as per usual, her somewhat detached observational nature made me start to put into words the things that I have been feeling. I have been reveling in the uncomfortable nature of not “knowing” the future.
That uncomfortableness made me realize a lot of things about how sometimes you can’t just get things because you want them – especially when love is involved. For an average looking guy, I have not faced rejection that often. I have successfully pursued many girls that were far out of my league. And I did this with the confidence that, if I tried hard enough, nothing could stop me. My mindset always was, as I’ve written before: I do know the future by heart, because the future resides within me. My Will creates the future as I want it….
With love, however – it’s different. Love shouldn’t be the powerful Will of another causing submission. It should be the interwoven passion of two people. Back when Sarah and I dated, she did one of the most romantic things that a woman has ever done for me. I arrived at her house after work to a note that said, “Go to the place where we had our first date….” I went, where I was greeted by more clues that lead me on a scavenger hunt throughout the months of our relationship. When I finally gathered all the clues, I was directed to her place where she was there – cooking for me. We had a nice dinner and I have never felt more loved in my life. She illustrated her passion in me by going above and beyond. Our passions were aligned and that lead to our relatively successful relationship.
Looking back over things, I realize that if you spend too much time trying to create the future – you never will receive the affection in return. Over the course of years, I never did get anything in return. There were gifts of all sizes sent to whatever location she was in – even ones that never arrive because of Italian customs. There were password protected Posterous accounts that had pictures of every time I thought of her – a site with over 300 posts in 4 months that she never even bothered to check once. There was so much passion and Will to make something happen that, l forgot to even see if there was passion being returned. There wasn’t and there is really no one to blame other than myself.
So, with this introspection, I realize that I can no longer google my future to determine what will happen. There’s no “George G Smith Jr’s future is….” blog post out there that will determine it. No image search that will identify future lovers. Ultimately, it’s each and every moment – filled with the horrifically beautiful “unknown.” I think I’m finally ready to let go of the need to “know” the future and just sit back and enjoy the present…
Rewatching Casablanca
Tonight, as I was working, I decided to watch Casablanca. I have seen the movie hundreds of times but tonight, what struck me was Ingrid Bergman. She plays her character Ilsa so well, and perhaps it’s just the black and white cinematography but there is a bittersweet glistening in her eyes – like someone who has cried a few too many tears – which fits with the character. It’s catching these things that I had not noticed before that.
As the weather starts to cool off, I would expect that my movie watching would start to pick up. Back in High School, my friend Brian and I watched the AFI’s top 100 movies. I’m not sure if we ever got through the entire thing, but we definitely watched the top 25. I think it might be nice to start that over again – to consume these movies with a new perspective. I’m older, sometimes wiser, and much more experienced.
My Review of District 9
Spoiler Alert: The following review of the movie District 9 contains spoilers.
Saved by the Bell Reunion?
Is it sad that I get excited over the prospect of a Saved by the Bell Reunion?
Eight-Five-Eight
Vanessa and I filmed a little episode for Eight-Five-Eight.com today. In case you didn’t know, Eight-Five-Eight.com is our new house blog. It’s still being built but we figure we could have some fun with this. Anyway – check it out and visit Eight-Five-Eight.com
Random Thoughts on Anonymity on the Web
So – my roommates just had a dance party/lip synching party on UStream.tv. It was pretty funny – although an hours worth of it kind of got annoying. It was pretty funny some of the comments that were in the chat. This was the second UStream we’ve done recently and the anonymous chats are pretty interesting. That, of course, lead me to start really thinking about anonymity on the web. I know I’m not the first person to think about this topic – nor do I expect to come up with any new observations – so I won’t go into too much detail about my thoughts. Still, it is something strange to think that people will revert to ugly behavior when they can not be identified. The socialization of the Internet – whether through OpenID, Facebook Connect, or the next form that develops – will help alleviate some of those concerns. You can start to see it now – with people wanting real pictures, real names, and no hidden identities on the various platforms that develop. Hopefully this will bring about the best behavior from web citizens, but it probably won’t change everything. And while I know the anonymous people on the UStream line were friends just teasing – these thoughts still came up.
What is Culture?
I’ve been thinking a lot about Culture since Zappo’s Tony Hsieh’s keynote address at South By Southwest. In my career, having worked at a bunch of different companies in different regions of the country, corporate culture is a topic that intrigues me. Afterall, most people spend the majority of their days ingrained into their corporate culture so therefore it has to be an important aspect of our society to understand. I am brainstorming a blog post on this subject and I just wanted to throw up the keynote address from Tony and ask you this question: “What is culture?”
SXSW: Always Be Charging (The Blog)
Just did a video with Kip Bodnar for www.alwaysbecharging.com
Always Be Charging – like I wrote in the previous post – is a key to survival here at #SXSW. Stay tuned for more video pod casts from the Pepsi Podcast Playground here at #SXSW
