Threatened at BlogHer

Someone tried to blackmail me at BlogHer. Seriously – I don’t even know how to summarize the story in complete detail as the past few days in Chicago have been quite the whirlwind. I understand that, as brands, we bring the “grabby” nature of swag bags out in people. I understand that people can feel cheated by paying for things and not receiving them. I get that – and while I don’t condone that behavior, I at least understand why it happens. What I don’t get is why someone would attempt to hold me hostage for a pair of shoes…

I’m sitting in the lobby of the Sheraton – where I spent much of my time. I was just hanging out, doing some work, and talking to the people who were coming up to me. Okay – I’ll be honest, I was talking to people and playing the “Tiles” game on Microsoft Surface because, (expletive deleted), that is possibly the most addicting game ever. Anyway, it was about mid-afternoon when someone came up to me. I’ll call her generic mommyblogger because I couldn’t pick her out of a lineup if I tried.

“Are you the Crocs guy?” she asks, timidly.

I look up and smile. After all, it’s nice to be recognize and it’s a sign that I’m doing my job right.

“Yes, I am.”

We continue with small talk. She says her name but, while I probably caught it at the time, it slipped out of my memory as the events of the next couple moments transpired. She asked how I was doing at BlogHer. If I was having fun. How it felt to be one of the only men there – all those typical questions that were being asked of me. Then her demeanor changed completely. She mentioned how she didn’t get any shoes at the SocialLuxe lounge. I apologized, saying that we provided what we could but it’s hard because we didn’t know everyone’s shoe size. She nodded but I could tell that wasn’t the answer she wanted to hear. Then she says something that I couldn’t believe.

“Ya know, if you don’t give me shoes – I could totally write something bad about you on my blog.”

“Excuse me?” I asked – hoping she would laugh or give me some indication that she was just joking around. Nope…

“It’s just a pair of shoes. It’s a lot easier to give them to me than deal with the negative press I could make.”

After hearing that, I start to laugh. First of all, I don’t recognize this woman at all. When she mentioned who she was at the beginning of the conversation, it didn’t ring a bell and I do a fairly good job at making sure I pay attention to the “players” in the sphere. Beyond that, I connect with hundreds of bloggers of all sizes and I am very good at treating them with the respect that they deserve as writers, photographers, artists, and people. This person was a nobody. So, I reacted in the only way that I saw fit.

“I could pick up my phone here and get in contact with so many people and tell them what just happened that you would be afraid to go near your computer, let alone attempt to blog again.”

She looked shocked – like she really thought her sad attempt to blackmail me would work. In a second, she walked away and, before I could really gather myself, disappeared into a sea of bloggers. I never saw her again and, if it didn’t effect me so much, I would have doubted as to whether it happened or not. Sadly, it did. I really hope it was an isolated incident but it’s something to watch out for. Brands aren’t the only people that have to learn how to work in this sphere. Bloggers do too. I know the BlogHer community would police behavior like that – so I just wish I could have remembered her name or grabbed a business card….

My whole experience at BlogHer was a positive one. I feel like Crocs nailed it, I got to meet some of my favorite people in person, and connected with a whole group of people I never met before. This incident was small and isolated. It was someone I never saw before and never saw again – the personification of an anomaly. I debated on whether I should even bring it up but then I realized that, while I may know enough people that I probably could have lived up to my response to her – other brands may not. I guess this is just a public service announcement that there are people out there that would do this, so as a community, we all need to watch out for it…

(Editor’s Note: Never thought this would become this big of a thing (I blame @jowyang haha) but, I did want to reinforce that this is NOT in any way indicative of behavior that I commonly see from Bloggers. BlogHer reinforced the fact that the bloggers I work with every day are some of the most intelligent, professional, and caring people in the world. As a man in a conference of women, I felt included and I am proud to call many people my friend. This incident was something I wanted to share with the 10 people that read my blog and a few people in the twitterverse. 7/27/09 6:16pm MT ~GS)

(Editor’s Note 2: The “nobody” comment was meant to be that she was a nobody because she threatened me. Not because she has no audience. My favorite bloggers to work with are the amazing writers that haven’t had a chance to be read. Most of the people that commented below would back me up with that, but I did want to clear it up 7/27/09 8:11pm MT ~GS)

  • http://www.lizzydearslife.com/ Liz

    Wow!! This is ridiculous! I honestly can't imagine someone doing this seriously, it's awful. I'm sorry you had to come in contact with such an ugly encounter, and I hope that this person hasn't ruined the reputation of many of us other bloggers out there!

  • http://misspriss.org/ becky

    I definitely think you should have told this story, George. And I'm glad you did.

    I do take exception to this being laid at the feet of mommybloggers. Unless you discussed her kids or she told you she was a mommyblogger, it could have been ANY woman at the conference. Not all in attendance were moms. I'm just tired of the moms being blamed for every piece of bad behavior this year.

    If she told you she was a mom, then calling her “generic mommyblogger” was perhaps warranted.

    • GeorgeGSmithJr

      In the small talk, she did mention kids. That's why I gave her that title. I wouldn't throw “moms” under the bus like that. Heck, I hate the term mommy blogger to begin with. Most of my favorite “Mommy bloggers” don't necessarily write about their kids!

  • http://www.ExtraordinaryMommy.com/blog ExtraordinaryMommy

    George – you are PRICELESS. I'm glad you stood up for yourself. I'm glad you stood up for Crocs – because to have handled it any other way would have been to give in to the idea that bloggers/PR/Brands should be DEMANDING anything from each other. We are trying to work TOGETHER. I know this woman isn't the norm. I know you believe strongly in a positive relationship between Crocs and Bloggers – good heavens – you sent my daughter the most FANTASTIC Crocs when our original order didn't arrive. Thank you again for taking your job so seriously and still being able to laugh with us. So great to have time to chat!

  • http://www.pajamasandcoffee.com/?p=486 marymac

    agree- am a mom of four but hate being called a mommyblogger. i was a writer and a journalist BEFORE i had kids- the term sort of makes us define ourselves by them.

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  • http://www.twitter.com/lindsaydavies Lindsay Davies

    See that you're staying true to form George, transparent, fair and proactive. It's good to read the comments below are in support of your decision to go public on your experience. Testament to the reputation that you have built within your networks. I think this story shows the power of social media in both the positive and the negative demonstrating that politeness and decorum are even more essential to business in a world which is so socially connected.

  • janegassner

    Crocs were at BlogHer'09? Who knew. I'd feel badly about missing the SocialLuxe party (was it invite only?), but I think Crocs should feel worse that their rep wasn't out and about meeting people. Good will, you know….etc.etc.

    Signed: BlogHer'09 attendee who is also a Croc-wearer

    • GeorgeGSmithJr

      Jane -

      Sad that I didn't get a chance to meet you. We were sponsors at Social Luxe and the People's Party on Thursday. I met with hundreds of people, but in a conference of 1500, I couldn't possibly have met everyone. I can always be reached at gsmith@crocs.com or via TWITTER at @crocs or @georgegsmithjr. Feel free to say hi – and then next time we won't miss each other!!

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  • http://lifeintheshortlane.com/ Margo

    That I'm chiming in so late kind of says it all. I wasn't at blogher. Love blogging, but relatively new to it- longtime professional writer and wildly put off about this attitude. It's still amazing to me how fast a few bad eggs can mess things up for other hardworking and talented people. The illusions of grandeur illustrated on this blogger's part crack me up – and I'm way past choosing to deal with it. Which makes me want to share -my kids are teenagers, I'm over 45 and no one calls me “mommy” anymore. My perception may be wrong, but most(blogging, social media, etc.) seems to be about the women who are a decade or more younger than I am, because that's where the critical mass currently is. Generationally speaking and as a whole, I perceive these women as hugely more brazen than most women closer to my age would ever have dreamed of being. I'm kind of envious, and mean that as a complement. I feel “in the game” and I like my blog content, but feel like a johnny come lately, old girl – struggling to figure out how to get people to my blog and judge for themselves – without resorting to personal, non-constitutional pandering or shoe blackmail! (not that I ever – as this self professed demographic, ever could do that :) Thanks for the insiders point of view!

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  • catherinecopeland

    I'm a blogger and I went to blogher myself. I probably saw you there because it seems I was always traversing through the lobby.

    I was just so overwhelmed with the whole blogher experience I was shell shocked. I actually did receive a pair of crocs at the social luxe party and even though they weren't my size I want to thank you.

    You see I teach in an inner city school and not all of “my kids” can afford new clothes or new shoes. Thanks to you I was able to give a young lady in my class a pair of shoes she adores. She told me in halting English that she'd never owned a new pair of shoes EVER. I was also able to give my LandsEnd book bag to another student and I've already thanked them.

    I couldn't get over the way some self-absorbed bloggers felt that they were such big fish in the blog pond. I am not that delusional. I'm still new at blogging and I hope I never become so self absorbed that I have to try to blackmail someone for anything.

    Thanks again!!!! I can't tell you how happy it made me to present this beautiful girl with such a wonderful gift.

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  • whenonedoorcloses

    Good for you! I am, on a daily basis, amazed by the sense of entitlement some people seem to have. I applaud your reply. I'd still be sitting there with my mouth gaping open if that happened to me. Ya done good.

  • Barking_Mad

    I am absolutely gobsmacked that someone could think that pulling a stunt like that would net her anything but the crap she threatened you with. Power, perceived or otherwise is a dangerous thing in the hands of the wrong people…she is definitely one of the “wrong people” and by her own example, probably doesn't wield enough real power in the blogosphere to smack down a fly!

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  • http://allantyoung.com Allan

    Even if you got her name and blog, you'd probably have been nice and left that out. The nature of the story was notable enough without names. Thanks for sharing this experience.

    I've known a couple of “bloggers” that thought their own little platform gave the license to abuse businesses. One “blogger” or “social geek” who is active on Twitter actually thought that his local Chick-fil-A should honor a non-existent coupon he mistakenly believed was valid because he has a huge following and could cause them bad publicity. That they should make an exception for him because he has a semi-popular blog. Behavior like this makes it harder for businesses to trust bloggers.

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  • jsryan25

    I have recently had a mommy blogger try and attach me with her “mommy blogging product poacher posse” via twitter. I work for a company and we were in contact and she became irate that our company would not send her item(s) for free. Our items our handmade and retail for over hundreds of dollars and we asked her for TEN dollars an item plus shipping and handling to cover costs. I understand that this is an ABSORBENT cost and she would probably no longer be able to feed her family. (insert sarcasm where necessary).

    I don’t know where her false sense of entitlement comes from….. Probably one too many animal crackers. I would looooove to post this crazy person/ robot e-mail. I am not sure why some feel that they should SELL themselves out for free items. I guess that’s what you do when you have no identity, no attention from your family, and access to a CPU.

    I would also like to submit my FULL story and details.

    • http://www.jonniker.com/ jonniker

      You asked her to REVIEW a product. YOU ASKED HER TO REVIEW IT. No, no she's not going to pay you to do you a favor.

      Go ahead. Post all the details. This is not like croctomom. This is nowhere near it. This is nowhere NEAR what George is talking about.

      You. Are. Threatening. Her. You're doing it by posting about her all over the Internet, when I'm sorry, it is you, in this case, who clearly has the problem. It's one thing for her to beg you for free product (like George alleges happened to him), but quite different when YOU approach HER to review a product for you, give you free publicity and yet, have her pay you.

      She's happy to go without your product. This. Is. Not. The. Same. Thing.

      I'm disgusted by you and your company, whoever you are. You're threatening HER.

    • jsryan25

      What are you talking about>? She is the one that is e-mail me constantly
      to tell me that she is a blogg queen. I am not at fault. She can say no
      thank you just how I said no thank you to her via e-mail.

      Thank you for your comment

    • jsryan25

      when did the word Review = Favor. I didn't ask her to plug anything.

    • http://www.nosenseoftime.org George G Smith Jr

      Well – I'll refrain from getting really involved here since I don't know the details of this particular issue. I do sense an extreme sense of hostility coming from you Mr. Ryan. A disagreement with one blogger does not mean you need to patronize the entire field of bloggers with comments like “one too many animal crackers.” I am almost tempted to remove the comment from my blog but since others have already seen it, I'll refrain from doing so.

      Maria – I don't need to say anything to you. You seem to know how to defend yourself. lol

    • MommyMelee

      Actually we were only upset when, after we mutually decided not to proceed with the review, you spammed our comment form saying YOURBLOGMAKESMEILL YOURBLOGMAKESMEILL.

      We were able to match the IP address of that comment to Mr. Ryan's workplace in Winchester, Virginia.

      At YourMamaReviews.com, we feature a mix of products we received to review and those we purchase on our own. Mr. Ryan contacted our team requesting a review. After my colleague exchanged a few emails with him, he mentioned that he would need to charge us $10 an item plus S/H to review them.

      I would absolutely be fine paying for an item that I'm interested in, but to be frank, we would not even be willing to revew $200 Swiss wooden blocks. If Mr. Ryan had taken any amount of time to read our site before soliciting us for a review, he'd see that our focus is on affordable products for families on a budget.

      I'm disappointed to see an individual in charge of blog outreach stooping to harass us via our contact form. I've also seen that Mr. Ryan has posted an “Anti-mommy-blogger” link from both his corporate account and one he made last night to tweet at me with. I have taken screencaps of all tweets since he's since erased them.

      I'm also disappointed to see Mr. Ryan making unfounded claims, such as below. I've actually never exchanged an email with him personally, let along emailed him to let him know I'm a blog queen. Bizarre. And frankly, disconcerting.

  • tidymom

    WOW! I'm SHOCKED…….seriously? people act like this? I'm trying to make my way to my first blog conference, I can't imagine someone acting that way!…..I'm amazed every day at the things that come out of people's mouths! Kudo's to YOU for the great comeback!! When someone catches me off guard like that, I'm so shocked I never have anything great to say back to them! (honestly, I just don't think that way I guess lol) I loved your reply!!

  • tidymom

    WOW! I'm SHOCKED…….seriously? people act like this? I'm trying to make my way to my first blog conference, I can't imagine someone acting that way!…..I'm amazed every day at the things that come out of people's mouths! Kudo's to YOU for the great comeback!! When someone catches me off guard like that, I'm so shocked I never have anything great to say back to them! (honestly, I just don't think that way I guess lol) I loved your reply!!

  • tidymom

    WOW! I'm SHOCKED…….seriously? people act like this? I'm trying to make my way to my first blog conference, I can't imagine someone acting that way!…..I'm amazed every day at the things that come out of people's mouths! Kudo's to YOU for the great comeback!! When someone catches me off guard like that, I'm so shocked I never have anything great to say back to them! (honestly, I just don't think that way I guess lol) I loved your reply!!

  • tidymom

    WOW! I'm SHOCKED…….seriously? people act like this? I'm trying to make my way to my first blog conference, I can't imagine someone acting that way!…..I'm amazed every day at the things that come out of people's mouths! Kudo's to YOU for the great comeback!! When someone catches me off guard like that, I'm so shocked I never have anything great to say back to them! (honestly, I just don't think that way I guess lol) I loved your reply!!

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  • Anonymous

    This is completely insane. I can’t begin to imagine how this blogger thought this sounded like a good idea for a first interaction with anyone. I am saddened that this happened to you. It must have been so very very surreal.

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  • http://www.shasherslife.com/ Shash

    WOW! speechless. p.s. your gut reaction was awesome.